Listen, clothes aren't that important. At the end of the day, we'd easily endorse a good man in a polyester tracksuit over a snake in Savile Row's finest. That said, for the sake of your professional career and personal reproductive aspirations, we
strongly suggest that you consider
this list of style fails compiled by our friends at
GQ. Surprisingly, though, the list's missing some of the biggest fails we see around town, the most common of which is the (Kenneth Cole) square-toe dress shoe -- in lace-up and loafer form. To call these things unrefined is like calling the Nets a work in progress. We'll get to clothes later (
suggestions?), but other all-too-common footwear fails include:
"Hybrids" -- Some occasions call for sneakers; some call for shoes. None call for these ill-conceived eyesores.
"Contoured" (Puma) kicks and (Paul Smith) dress shoes -- They had their moment about 10 years ago, but now it's time to put this streamlined look out of its misery. Like the lesson we learned with "hybrids," if life calls for a sharper looking sneaker, wear a shoe.
"???" -- We don't have a name for these monstrosities, but they and their beastly brethren are all over the place. They're like the black square-toe's ugly cousin. God-awful.
Listen, clothes aren't that important. At the end of the day, we'd easily endorse a good man in a polyester tracksuit over a snake in Savile Row's finest. That said, for the sake of your professional career and personal reproductive aspirations, we strongly suggest that you consider this list of style fails compiled by our friends at GQ. Surprisingly, though, the list's missing some of the biggest fails we see around town, the most common of which is the (Kenneth Cole) square-toe dress shoe -- in lace-up and loafer form. To call these things unrefined is like calling the Nets a work in progress. We'll get to clothes later (suggestions?), but other all-too-common footwear fails include: 
"Hybrids" -- Some occasions call for sneakers; some call for shoes. None call for these ill-conceived eyesores.
"Contoured" (Puma) kicks and (Paul Smith) dress shoes -- They had their moment about 10 years ago, but now it's time to put this streamlined look out of its misery. Like the lesson we learned with "hybrids," if life calls for a sharper looking sneaker, wear a shoe.
"???" -- We don't have a name for these monstrosities, but they and their beastly brethren are all over the place. They're like the black square-toe's ugly cousin. God-awful.
slouch beanies! so fucking lame.
ReplyDeleteCome on- Crocks! Saw some guys in uggs this winter. Made me die a little inside.
ReplyDeleteHysterical!
ReplyDeleteit's MAN-DALS season!
ReplyDeleteThought you'd get a kick out of this, Sam.
ReplyDeleteShort of a night at the opera, does it ever make sense for a man to wear patent leather? I especially hate shoes that mix patent leather with more casual materials like suede or canvas. Always seems like there are a few of those available downstairs at the Steven Alan sample sale for about $25.
ReplyDeleteMy favorite hobby on the subway is looking at shoes and the people in them. I agree that the square toe is the worst. Although, is there anything worse than socks with sandals
ReplyDeletei just ordered some sneakers that look like brogues! lmayonnaise
ReplyDeleteand i will rock them!!
Seriously don't get the Paul Smith thing, but I guess mileage may vary. Square toes make my brain hurt, though. And they are EVERYWEHRE.
ReplyDeleteNot all Paul Smith shoes, but he does this highly "contoured" thing that's just wrong on many levels:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.paulsmith.co.uk/shop/paul-smith-mens-shoes-390/paul-smith-mens-shoes-dip-dye-parnu-2-off-white-shoe-sbxd-c249-wsh-o3/product.html
Square toes are the new pirates, pirates are the new robots.
ReplyDelete